Secrets to Happiness: Secret #8

I promised--promised!--that I would do a simpler secret this time. Well, it can be said that "keep your promises" will not be it today.

Over the last couple of days as the buildup in anticipation and workload for this weekend's kid Halloween party continues, tension has been mounting here in the Happy Family household.

Twice this week, my daughter forgot important things for school and I made the trek there as deliveryman. Both times I had to fight the resentment. I had to force down my measurement of her gratitude and her remorse for her failure to bring the stuff in the first place.

My son, struggling to finish month long homework assignments right before they're due, somehow makes me feel frustrated at him for not being better at time management. Then I blame my own parenting skills, thinking that I could have been sterner throughout the month about his schedule.

And, Jocelyn, is as excited as the kids about this party. She's been shopping, decorating, planning, stressing, obsessing, worrying, shopping and just making me wish that this was all over.

I was on the verge of having my own emotional explosion. Then I stopped, I slowed down and I regrouped. I let it go and I remembered the next secret:

Love them

I could throw Covey or Buscaglia quotes at you, but you don't need them. You know what I mean. Love them. Help them. Stop whining about your own problems or your interpretations of their problems.

I've been quietly asking Monica if everything is prepared for tomorrow. I did not demand "thank yous" or apologies for the mistakes during the week, though she did give them to me. Gabe finished his homework without any additional pressure from his parents. And I took the day off today to help Jocelyn prepare for the party.

I love my family. If they need me, I'll be there, no matter what.

The "them" doesn't have to be an immediate family. It could be friends, your employees or colleagues, people you take care of or people who take care of you, or everybody (if you aspire to be a saint.)

Can this unconditional love go too far? Is it possible to love that way if you aren't loved in return? That is, is unconditional love really for real?

(My name is Doug, but I am not Doug Savage. His hilarious Post-It note panels can be found here.)